FRRO

FRRO Mumbai 

Foreign Regional Registration Offices is part of the Indian Department of Immigration. It is where we had to go to get an exit visa approved for the girls. You need a valid visa to enter and leave India. As Willow and Taylor where born here and only obtained Australian Citizenship after their birth they had no valid visa in their new passports. With out one, we could not take them out of India. So it was the final piece in the puzzle before we could bring them home.

If you have done a Dr Google search on the FRRO you might well have read some of the horror stories that we had. But we were in and out in less than 3 hours. The staff were friendly, if not efficient and were very considerate of us with the babies. Being a Saturday morning it was also a bit quieter. I just made sure i had everything on the list Mike and Youseff gave us and it all went very smoothly.

We thought about changing our flights again, but a couple of extra days is not worth the hassle and cost. At least now I am relaxed. Vince is catching up on some much needed sleep and I am here staring at our girls and shooing off the house cleaning boys who seem determined to clean our room rather frequently of late. I know they love looking at the babies. They all grin and chatter about them as they clean the room.

In our excitement on leaving the FRRO we forgot to take a picture. So this one is borrowed from Dr Google. They also get a bit funny about you photographing government buildings, so there was not many to choose from.

When we get back to Australia I am going to post a guide for dealing with the bureaucratic process based on our experience and the information we have gathered along the way. At the moment I don't seem to have the time between feeds and am really only catching the various mile stones for Willow and Taylor.

Now do I clean the bottles next or hang the washing. Nope. Nice cuppa and then a cuddle before the next feed. Cuddle of the girls that is. An earthquake would not wake Vince at the moment. He has taken the brunt of the night feeds for the past couple of days. Tonight I am going to play the night owl. A role that is usually mine anyway. It is usually me on the computer or watching a show at midnight with noddy, plus or minus drool, sitting next to me. He has always said that he can't sleep until I am in the bed and so sits up. I guess sleeping on the couch with a hyper extended neck is much easier. Funny thing is that I actually love him sitting there. It is comforting. From now on though I reckon it will be a race to see who gets to sleep first.

J.

Passports

Look what I've got!!

The Embassy called this morning and said the girls passports would be ready for this afternoon. So I took another trip with Mr Singh and look what I've got.

Tomorrow the FRRO is open and so Mr Singh is picking us up at 8am. Fingers crossed by tomorrow night we will have jumped all the hoops and can then just relax for a couple of days until our flight.

Going to celebrate now with a stiff Bacardi and a slice of pizza.

Our Little Aussies

There was a great surprise in our inbox this morning. An email from Varun at the High Commission confirming the girls Citizenship by Descent. It included copies of their certificates. I am so glad it was just us here. We both broke into idiotic grins, done our happy dance and started shouting Aussie Aussie Aussie Oy Oy Oy! If we had neighbours they would have quickly turned on the TV to check if Australia had scored in the cricket (honestly they are cricket obsessed in this country). I was on the phone to the Mumbai Embassy and scored an appointment to submit the girls passport applications in the early afternoon. Vince booked our favourite taxi driver Mr Singh and I quickly showered and threw together all the documentation (it is almost as thick as a novel now). It took nearly two hours in the taxi, due to traffic, to get to the Embassy. They were really help full and it only took as long as it took me to complete the forms. They are quite used to surrogacy cases by now and it is quite a smooth process. 

I can collect the girls temporary passports at 0930am on Monday and then it is off to the Foreigner Regional Registration Office (FRRO) to get an exit permit. Mr Singh has kindly offered his services for the day. I have read horror stories about this place and was a little nervous that it would be the spanner in the works. But Michael and Youseff were kind enough to let Vince tag along when they went, as a reconnaissance mission. The process went smoothly for them and Vince got some great intelligence from his recon. So here's hoping it goes smoothly for us as well. Our tickets have been changed so that we fly out at 1030am on Wednesday the 9th February.

I have to say that I am so relieved. As much as it has been so rewarding having this time with just our new family nestled away with nothing to do but get to know one another, home is appealing. We are surviving with what we have accumulated in the unit and it is livable. But is only just an existence. We have to wash every day and are constantly washing bottles. At home we have enough that these can be done with a little more leisure. We also have so many amazing clothes and other items that we could be using. It also means that we do not have to boil the kettle 10 to 20 times a day. We have been a little OCD with using boiled water for everything, but given that the girls are so small and had a little bit of a rough start we owe it to them to give them the best chance of not catching anything.

We are also missing our other babies Spike, Bilbo and Maggy. I can't wait for a Spikey hug. Both of us are also really looking forward to lots of hugs and kisses from family and friends. After all it is all about us. the girls might be lucky to get some attention when we get home.

I have asked to see our surrogate before we go and we have some gifts for her and her family. Dr Meenakshi has said she will set up a meeting. Let's hope it comes off. We really want to say thank you in person. We also want to show her how much the girls are being loved and cared for.

Well this Dad (and Papa) are going to try and catch an hours sleep before the next feed. the way Taylor is groaning, it is going to be a long night again. She has the worst gas and it is so hard to get up. Willow is just a wind machine. Puts her Dad to shame.

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OY OY OY!



Follow Up

Plumb tuckered out 

We ventured back to Surya Children's Hospital today for the girls follow up appointment. Dr Kabra was happy with their progress. Both had put on weight and grown a little. They are now both 49cm long and both their heads are 32cm. Taylor at 2.36kg has taken over from Willow at 2.24kg as the heavier twin. We weren't surprised based on how well Taylor is feeding. We also had to take them for their eye follow up and both were normal. The actual test was not very pleasant and we know now why there eyes are a little swollen. But it did not seem to hurt them. They just didn't like the bright light. After another day out and about they were both exhausted when we got home. It was also one of the hottest days we have had since being here and they are like me and feel the heat. So we left them in only their nappies and these little singlets to cool off. They both went out for the count. We both hope they may sleep for a little longer between each feed tonight. Well here's hoping, anyway.

Night,
J.

In Sympathy

We received some very upsetting news today from our friend Steve. We met Steve very early in this journey when we first came to India and I have spoken of him in a number of posts. He became a friend and we have remained in contact, sharing our journeys, both the ups and downs. He has been so very supportive of us and we have been so excited to hear his progress towards becoming a father. Unfortunately today Steve's twin girls where still born. So we send Steve our heart felt condolences and offer him our love and support as he grieves for his lost angels. Being so far away makes it difficult to offer any support other than to know we are with you in spirit and can only offer our true sympathy. Words seem inadequate to express the sadness we feel. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers.

 

Love, your Aussie Mates

Jem and Vince

Love and other things....

Tiredness: adj, Exhausted of strength or energy, fatigued.

Yes we are both tired. It was inevitable and something we knew would be part of this amazing experience. We both wear it as a badge of honour. Who could see it as such a bad thing when at 3am when the rest of the world is asleep, a little human being looks up at you and smiles as the wind in their tummy shifts. Then we look at each other and grin. Well we grin, between the yawns. 

Love: noun, a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.

We are both so in love with our baby girls and have been so overwhelmed with the beginning of our new family. There are so many emotions involved, that the definition  above just does not reflect them. Love is innate and therefore pure. At this time in our lives, love again is pure.

Peace: noun, Inner contentment; serenity.

At home we have a mortgage (well two at the moment), car loans, bills, work and so on. In our little world that is apartment A603 Oritel Serviced apartments Mumbai, they do not seem to exist. We feel at peace and know that these two beings make all of that seem insignificant. They are worth what we will return to. For now we will just enjoy the tranquility that exists in our hearts.

Yesterday I rang the lab doing our DNA test to see if they had received our samples. They were supposed to let us know. Willow and Taylor's samples had arrived but mine was still missing in action. It seems that it may have been held up by the Australia Day public holiday. The 26th January is also a public holiday in India to mark Republic Day. It celebrates the day  India adopted democratic government system. They assured me that it should arrive by Monday and that it should only take five days to process. So it seems we are here for another fortnight at least.

We are both getting really homesick now and just want to get home. Home to the two dogs, cat and our own bed. To bring the girls home. To their new home. The home that Vince and I have made together and now get to share with our family. We want to introduce the twins to everyone. To let everyone shower them in the love and affection to has been flowing towards them since we first announced their impending arrival.



Youseff, Mike and Zayne at the FRRO after getting Zayne's exit visa

 On the first frantic morning at the hotel we ventured down to breakfast to try and sort out a means of communicating with Dr Meenakshi so that we could find out were the twins were, when and how we could get to them. As I have mentioned in a previous blog we were both frantic with lack of sleep, adrenaline from the news of two daughters and disorientated from the sudden change in environment. The first person we saw was a white man holding a baby. We all know to never assume as it  can make an ass out of u, but I automatically assumed "same-same". This is an Indian phrase that we have picked up for describing two  things alike. So with only just a little frantic desperation in my voice I asked "excuse me. Do you know how to connect to the Internet?" while wielding my laptop around. He kindly suggested that I seek assistance from the front desk staff in the foyer, which I acted on immediately. This kind sir was Mike. Once I was connected to the net we went back in to properly introduce our selves. Mike and his husband Youseff were from Canada and had arrived on the 30th of December for the birth of their son Zayne. Over the past three and a bit weeks they have been great company, become friends and helped to make this time both bearable and enjoyable. Last night they were lucky enough to fly home.



Willow, Taylor and Zayne

Watching them go through the bureaucratic process has given us greater confidence that things may progress a little quicker than we anticipated and also eased our minds that we are as prepared as possible. I have often wondered how people make friends that they then visit all over the world. Now I know. This journey has also enabled us to make some great new friends that we know we will keep in touch with and hopefully get to visit in the future. We also hope that they make be able to visit us. Willow and Taylor are also going to have a network of friends that they share a common story with and can tap into should ever they need too.

I have managed to do a little shopping and have collected some adorable outfits for when we get home. This week I would like to buy a couple traditional outfits and some material to take home for Grandma and Granmere so they can make some outfits. Willow and Taylor get 10kg each of check-in luggage and I intend to make sure we use it. I know we can get clothes at home, but here they are very different and many will not be available. I have found that most of the shops in Perth all carry the same stock.

We also hope to see our surrogate sometime in the next week or so. Dr Meenakshi has said that it would be possible. We know that she is back with her family and doing well. We can't wait to introduce her to the twins and to express our eternal thanks for the gift to us.

Well it is near seven o'clock and I had better think about feeding myself before the girls start demanding their next feed. One of the positive side effects of spending time in the NICU is that both of them can sleep through anything. But when they wake up they usually wake with a bang and want things done then and there. They also developed a fairly regular routine and so it is a little easier to predict when that is going to happen. So far we have been able to problem solve each issue as it arises and seem to be coping well. We just need to work out how to take naps during the day. Something neither of us is used to or very good at. I am thinking though that it will get easier as we get more and more tired.

We are both anxious to have the girls weighed to see if they are gaining weight. Our follow up appointment is on Tuesday. They are both feeding well and demanding more each day. They are both peeing and pooing and doing everything they should.

We want to congratulate Tony and Immy on the birth of daughter Indie.

Night.
J.


PS: Happy Birthday Grand pere and Happy Wedding Anniversary Grand mere and Grand pere 


Love and best wishes
Jeremy, Vince, Willow and Taylor

Willow's Home

Well everything went as planned and Willow came home with us today. It was a repeat of the day Taylor came home, with just as much emotion and joy. We came home to the hotel and introduced her to Mike, Youseff and Zayne. Then we took her upstairs for her first bath and feed. Vince bathed her while I sorted out all of the paper work we got, to make sure we did not lose anything. Willow's first feed took nearly an hour to get her to take just 25mls. At the NICU they have been cup feeding her and she tires very quickly with the bottle. Taylor was the same for the first couple of days. The good thing is that Willow now weights 2.19 kg and has been gaining weight. It is going to be a long night because we are both so nervous for her.

We had to get more medications for Taylor so we asked the Guys to join us for an outing to Hiranandani Garden. We got the tablets we needed and had a quick look around the small village of shops. I managed to buy some little shoes for our god daughter, who's birthday it was while we were away, to add to her birthday present for when we get home. Then we decided to have dinner at a restaurant before returning home to Skype the grand parents. Willow took it in her stride much the same as Taylor did on her first night out. She just would not take the bottle. Vince is so very patient that he just kept offering it to her and she eventually took enough for us not to worry. For her third feed I did have to cup feed her after she only took 20mls. She took nearly 50ml in total using the cup instead of the bottle.

We are spending a great deal of time just staring at them tonight and I don't envisage us getting a lot of sleep. Mostly because we just want to hold them and lay with Willow. She is still quite flat. Well compared to Taylor. Taylor is sleeping between feeds (as long as you get all of her wind up). She is starting to interact more and definitely knows her routine. She gave her first Diva performance today while Vince was waiting for me when I was in feeding Willow before we could leave. She gave a real performance for everyone in the waiting area. There are no problems with her lungs.

I got all of the mushy stuff out of the way with this mornings post. But to Willow herself, we love and adore you and are so glad you are with us. Again, this record of your arrival is our gift to you. So you know where it is you came from. You, along with Taylor, complete your Dad and Papa.

 



I got my sister back!



You OK Sis?



No more shots without my agent!



Bonding or Dad napping? not sure.



Papa Kangaroo

Night,
J.

Willow

Today is all about Miss Willow as we welcome her home, to join the fold that is now the Moore-Mazoue clan. We both woke early again today with the wonderful feeling of anticipation.

I have been asked a number of times now where we got the name Willow. Taylor Louise comes from my Mum, Louisa and Taylor was her Mum's middle name. Raymonde is Vince's Mum's name.

Willow is from the TV show Buffy. Buffy was and still is one of Vince and I favourite shows and we both loved the character Willow. It also happens to be the name of my favourite tree. I associate Willow's with magic and fairies, with beautiful English landscapes and tranquility. It is also know in some folklore as the tree of enchantment. The Willow is associated with the elements of water and the moon. It is also associated with femininity, love and healing. We are getting ready to collect our little bundle of feminine joy who, along with her sister, has enchanted us and mended our hearts by giving them something even more precious to love.

EDOD

Tonight I just wanted to mark the occasion that today Willow and Taylor would have been 36 weeks and today was their expected date of delivery or EDOD. Instead they have been with us for 2 weeks and four days. We were told today that Willow can definitely come home on Monday.

My trip to Delhi went well. Infact it went so well I really having nothing to write about. I was nervous, but felt that I coped well. The flight was uneventful and the Commision staff were really helpful. I found Delhi a great deal cleaner than Mumbai and it looked a lot easier to navigate. I only managed to see a little from the various cab trips. One of the drivers took me on a bit of a tour for an hour or so.

So my DNA has been done. Now it is just a matter of waiting for the application to come through.

A number of people have sent me links to the following story:

Gay couple wins right to parent surrogate twins

It was heartening to read. This is our next bastion to overcome when we got home. Thanks to those who have gone before us.

We gave the slings we brought with us another go today. They work great.

Night.

J.

Home Coming

On Tuesday the Australian Panel Doctor Dr Jayant Rele kindly agreed to come to the hospital and take the girls DNA test. I arranged with Dr Kabra for him to be able come and it all went to plan with everyone being so helpful. The girls had to have a heel stab similar to that needed for Guthrie's screening test done on newborns in Australia. It was all very official. The best thing was that it was one big step completed. Both the girls howled and showed that there was definitely nothing wrong with their lungs.

Yesterday morning we got up earlier than usual. I made one last pass over all of the documents we had amassed for the girls citizenship applications and then bundled them up into a satchel. We had booked our usual cool cab driver to come earlier as well. This was so that we could make a quick detour into Hiranadani Garden on the way to the hospital to send the applications by courier to the High Commission in New Delhi. I could have taken them with me when I fly to Delhi on Friday. Instead we felt that if we sent them earlier by courier, if anything was missing they could let us know and I could collect what was needed to take with me. Varun at the Commission also agreed that this was a good idea when he contacted me on the Tuesday to confirm an appointment for 230pm on Friday to have my DNA test done (after which I booked my ticket with Kingfisher Airlines to fly out 7 am Friday and back that night at 6pm, giving me a total of 9 hours in Delhi). I am just praying that it is not a heel prick!!!

So we were as organised as we could be. Off we went to Hiranandani and found Blue Dart DHL Couriers. We had read about them on a couple of other peoples blogs and thought they would offer us the best chance of getting the documents to Delhi. Turns out that we made the right choice. When I walked through the door the guy said straight away to me "Australian High Commission?". My shoulders must have dropped 10 inches as the weight of the world melted away. He then went on to say the Mr Varun must be getting old because he had been sending documents to him regularly for the last five years. I'm not sure if Varun would have appreciated this. I sure was comforted that the process has been happening for so long. it could only mean that practice makes perfect. So we can highly recommend Blue Dart as a courier. I even got to have a little conversation about the cricket. Always a favourite topic, Not! But hey, it helps to get along with people. You can track your parcel and I was even more impressed that it arrived exactly when they said it would. All for 400 rupee.

After Hiranandani we headed off to Santa Cruz the suburb where Surya Children's Hospital is. The scenery on the way has become quite familiar, even though every day we seem to take at least on little detour from the usual route. We made it to the hospital a little earlier than normal. The hospital has a number of different units which all branch off a central stair well. The girls are in the NICU on level 2. Along the wall of the stair well is a long bench seat where all of the parents congregate and wait for their turn to visit. The bench also serves as a storage locker for your shoes, which you have to take off before entering the unit. We have been privileged to be able to visit at the same time each day, outside of normal visiting hours. This is so that we respect the norm of men not being in the unit while Mums were feeding. At least that is how we understood it. So there is never really a big group here when we arrive. As we leave there is usually a large crowd of anxious parents wanting to get in. Every day there has been something different happening and the place is always so busy. So anytime we have had to spend waiting has always flown by. Some faces have also become familiar each day. I know we stick out like a sore thumb!

Having got there even earlier than usual, there was no one there and it was to early to go in. So we had time to sit there and talk. Turned out that we both had jitters in our stomach. Jitters caused by excited anticipation. Was this going to be the day that one of our little angels would come home with us. We had a bag all packed with ever thing we needed. We talked about how it was going to be hard to leave one behind. Then we both realised we needed to pee (nerves we guessed). Such a simple thing in India is not always easy. Not every where has toilet facilities. We new the hospital would and we managed to find the restroom. Anyone who has been to India will understand why I mentioned this. After a short time Dr Kabra called us into his office. He told us that Taylor was definitely being discharged today. I know we must have looked like two little kids who had gotten away with nicking a cookie from the jar. He went over how everything had to happen. What we needed to know about caring for Taylor. Then he completely surprised me by telling me that someone from the staff in the NICU had entered my name into google and this blog had come up. He said that he had read it and enjoyed it and that I wrote very well. I was a little embarrassed, but grateful. So I now make mention of Dr Kabra and all of the staff at Surya Childrens Hospital. Hoping that they may read this:

• Vince and I are eternally grate full to all of the amazing Doctors, Nurses and others at Surya who have cared for our darling daughters. When we knew the girls were so premature and had been admitted to a different hospital we were so very anxious. The team at Surya soon allayed those fears with their professional care of these very special human beings.  You made us feel welcomed and showed amazing compassion to those who are now the most treasured thing in the world to us. We can only thank you from the bottom of our hearts and wish everyone the best.

Once I had settled Taylor's account and we had fed Willow the nurses asked us to wait outside while they got Taylor ready to go home with us. Then the moment arrived and they handed us this little bundle. After this long post I can honestly say that I cannot describe our emotions. So I will simply post a picture:

Mr Singh (our regular driver) got quite shock when we walked up to the taxi holding a baby. We had forgotten to tell him that one of the girls might come home. He drove so carefully on the way home. Neither of us spoke the whole way home. We just starred and smiled. We very so happy that we gave Mr Singh double our normal tip. He has been really great to us.

When we got back to the hotel our new found friends Mike and Youssef and their son Zayne were waiting for us. Youssef kindly filmed our arrival which is a great little memento to have for Taylor.

We sat in the foyer with the Boy's, as we call Mike Youssef and Zayne who are a new family much like ours. Knowing that they understood this moment for us made it even more special and we were so glad that they were here to share it. Then we took Taylor up stairs, praying that the Internet gods were going to let us Skype some very excited people back home. We spent most of the afternoon sharing our daughter with the world. We also got to change and feed her in a relaxed environment. Taylor was a star and our first night could not have been better. There was only the one sad fact. Willow was now on her own. Our hearts were with her as well.

Much to Grandmas' frustration. We actually took Taylor out on her first night out on her first night home. We went out to a cafe called Indigo Cafe to help celebrate Youssef's birthday (which is today, so a big Happy Birthday). The trip to the cafe was like a mini tour of Andheri as our driver struggled to find the place. It is tucked away in a little back street. We were an hour late, but who cared. The cafe was worth the wait and the company was awesome and we had a fantastic night. the cafe serves beef and alcohol so this little carnivore was in heaven.

So that is the story so far. Tomorrow morning I fly to Delhi. Willow will have to make do without us for the day because we cannot take Taylor back into the NICU. The guy's have kindly offered to sit for us but Vince wants to stay at the hotel in case I need him and seeing that the computer is our best line of communication. Taylor is being fed by Papa as I type. So I am going to sign off and go pack my bag. Put all the paper work together (yes more paper work). Then snuggle with Taylor and Papa for a while until her next feed.

I have said many times now that this blog is meant as a record of the journey we have taken to achieve our Family. That it is a record for Willow and Taylor to know where they came from, how much they were wanted and how much they are and will always be loved. So Taylor I hope this story makes you smile one day. I know that my cheeks ache with smile that has now not left my face for the past two days. Willow you will never know how hard it was to leave you. But we know you are doing so well and will be with us soon.

For those contemplating this path I say it again. Don't let anyone put you off. How can this feeling of love be wrong. I only hope that what I have been sharing helps you to achieve this feeling of pure love.

J.